Tales of a Babysitting Nightmare

Not so long ago, I was sharing a babysitting horror story with a friend. It reminded me of many of the babysitting stories I acquired in the decade or so I spent babysitting to earn extra income through middle school and high school. There are many people I know who have pretty awful babysitting stories, but this one was definitely awful for me. It wasn't really scary like my friend who had a kid stick his foot in the garbage disposal and threaten to turn it on, but it was pretty awful nonetheless.

I was babysitting for a two little boys this particular day. One was about five and his little brother was about two. The older boy was pretty hyper and was a definite handful. I'm not sure why anymore but when I arrived the kids were watching a movie in their parents bedroom, so that is where we were hanging out. We were watching the movie Ice Age, and everything was going really smoothly. This was a rare occurrence when I was watching these darlings. Then the older boy asked me if he could read in his parents closet.

My fourteen or so year old self thought, "Well, he wants to read. That can't be a bad thing. So what if he's doing it in a closet? At least he's reading!" And so I told him he could. On the surface this didn't seem like a bad idea. After some time, I began to realize I should probably check on him. He'd been in the closet for what seemed like a while, and in my experience when loud kids get quiet for too long it usually means they are doing something they're not supposed to.

That's when I peeked into the closet. I saw him sitting with a flashlight snuggled into the corner of the closet. I then began to shut the door...when...wait. what. was. that? It couldn't be what I thought it was because it looked like a part of the female anatomy a little boy wouldn't be reading about. That sneak peek caused me to open the door to that closet again. When I finally did get a look at what he was reading I was shocked.

Sitting there in the closet, flashlight in hand, one leg folded on top of the other, the little five year old boy who I was supposed to be watching was sitting in his parent's bedroom closet reading Playboy.

I was mortified. I made the boy put it down and leave the closet and we played games the rest of the night. When his parents came home I couldn't bring myself to tell them what happened. I was so embarrassed and at 14 didn't exactly know how to broach the subject of a small boy finding a stash of Playboys. All I wanted to do was go home and never come back. I happened to be "busy" every time they called after that. I felt badly for taking the wimpy way out, but I just couldn't go back to that house.

It makes me laugh now. The fact that I caught a five year old looking at Playboy is really laughable. I've got many other random babysitting adventures, but that one certainly takes the cake. I hope it entertained you as much as it did me.

No Flying Cars?

It's Saturday morning and I'm sitting on my couch in my pajamas watching a movie on TV. I always love weekend mornings because I can get up and laze about in my pajamas without having to get myself up and out the door for work.

This morning I woke up and Back to the Future was on. I ate my cereal and watched the last part of the movie. There are a hand full of movies that I just cannot turn off when they come on TV. Back to the Future happens to be one of them. I love that movie! I sat through the end of the movie where Marty McFly gets hit on by his own mother and then brings his father, George, to her and makes them fall in love. Great stuff!

As with any trilogy, when one movie is on TV, next comes the sequel. I'm not one to love the sequels to Back to the Future, so usually once the first is done I flip the channel. I wasn't fast enough this morning and then as I watched I began to wonder...WHERE ARE THE FLYING CARS??

It always amuses me about what people thought the future was going to be like. Back to the Future II takes place in the year 2015. Apparently in the next four years we will have the following things: flying cars, hoverboards, self lacing shoes, self fitting jackets, and computerized waiters. We also wear our pants inside out. Oh, and the Cubs win the World Series.

Maybe I missed something...my car still drives on the ground. The only thing that I know of that hovers is a hovercraft and it's powered by a giant fan system. Last time I put on shoes, I laced them myself. One size fits all still means that something will never fit me. And I have only ordered food from real life wait staff. Oh, and sorry all you optimistic Cubs fans, but I still don't think this is your year. (And I don't just say that because I'm a Brewers Fan).

The world definitely has changed a lot since the 1980s. Technology changed in ways we couldn't have imagined. Computers and internet have revolutionized the way we live. I think we overestimated the way technology would change though. But who knows, maybe someday my shoes will still lace themselves.

Stories from Rm. 001

I've been wanting to write for some time now, but every time I sat at my keyboard, I wasn't really moved to write anything. Today I got a great idea to share with you some random moments that have happened in my class that just make me smile.

Story #1 Johnny and the Glog

I have a student named, well, not Johnny, but let's call him that. He's a student who has a difficult time learning and receives a lot of support in school. Johnny has a very dry sense of humor, but when you listen carefully, you'll find the things that he says are absolutely hilarious. Last week, students had to present an online poster to which they had posted two videos. Johnny was the star of his groups two videos. When the videos were playing he high tailed it to the back of the room like it was nobody's business. He wanted nothing to do with being near the front of the room while the video was playing.

Another thing you need to know about Johnny is that he has a difficult time forming words, so he has a very distinct voice and speech pattern when he talks. He's also heard himself recorded a number of times. As soon as he started speaking in the video, his response was, "WHY DO I SOUND BRITISH? Why am I doing that accent? I do not have an accent. Seriously! I sound British, why?"

It was all I could do to keep from laughing. That is his voice and he does sound a little British, but he wasn't doing an accent.

Story #2 Nemo Touched the Butt

There is a student in my afternoon class, who often cannot help but blurt out things at random. There are times when I am certain that he has no ability to keep comments to himself or use his internal monologue. Today, I was teaching students how to write concession statements in persuasive essays. In order to get students to remember how to do them, I told them to write a "but statement." I then made sure to point out what kind of but I meant. As I turned toward the board to begin modeling what I wanted them to do, this student said, "Nemo touched the butt." I couldn't help but laugh. Little did he know that is one of my favorite parts of Finding Nemo.

Story #3 What is it? A full moon!

There was a day earlier this year where my students were all acting cuckoo for cocoa puffs. I had a feeling that a full moon was nearing and that's why they were just acting awful. By the time my last class rolled around and they were also really talkative, I couldn't take it anymore. They were the unlucky group that got the lecture from Ms. W. Somewhere in the midst of my stern lecture to my absolutely SILENT class about being respectful in class, I made the comment, "What is it? A full moon?"  In the midst now of the silence a student very quietly went, "Ahooooooo" like a wolf howling at the moon. Everyone had their eyes on the student and then me, questioning, what are you going to do to him??? I took one look at the student, and burst into laughter. He looked at me and smiled. Then the kids looked confused and started to laugh. I told them that even I couldn't keep a straight face through that and then continued teaching. The kids were great the rest of the hour. Evidently a little howl was all we needed.